Dear Dorothy,
I am a 25-year-old university graduate. There is a girl I like so much. She finished secondary school last year and is turning 18 this year. I am in love with her and have told her so. Her response was that she wants to face her studies, eventually getting a law degree, and is not really interested in a serious relationship. She’d rather we are good friends. I give her whatever she requests from me because I love her very much, but she continues to refuse my advances for a deeper relationship. I feel I am being used. Please I need your advice on what to do about this relationship.
My dear,
I think you are dealing with a young woman who has her head in the right place. She understands that there is a time for everything under the heavens, a time to go to school and a time for romance. First things first. In this 21st century in which we live in a fast-changing knowledge economy, she is quite right to insist that she will rather face her studies than be distracted by getting involved in a serious relationship.
I think you need to slow down with this young lady. Apparently she is inexperienced in matters of the heart. Please let her be for now. She needs to concentrate on her studies, like she told you. If you think your love for her will stand the test of time, why not accept her offer of friendship and depending on how the friendship develops, she may grow to fall in love with you.
Good luck.