LAUGH QUOTE
Life is too short for chess. – Henry James Byron
SCRABBLE
Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road. I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
WISE GUYS ANSWER TO STUPID QUESTION
QUESTION: If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in other hand, what would you have?
WISE GUY: Very large hands.
CUTTING COMMENT
“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”
Drew Carey
TEACHER STUDENT
Teacher: “Kids, what does the chicken give you?”
Student: “Meat!”
Teacher: “Very good! Now what does the pig give you?”
Student: “Bacon!”
Teacher: “Great! And what does the fat cow give you?”
Student: “Homework!”
DON’T BUG ME
A boy asks his father, “Dad, are bugs good to eat?” “That’s disgusting. Don’t talk about things like that over dinner,” the dad replies. After dinner the father asks, “Now, son, what did you want to ask me?” “Oh, nothing,” the boy says. “There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone.”