LAUGH QUOTE
Life is divided into two stages: in first, there is no mind, in second – no health.
DUMB LAWYER.
Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn’t know anything about it until the next morning? (REAL COURT RECORDS. Salt Lake Tribune. Taken from real court records).
WISE GUYS ANSWER TO STUPID QUESTION
QUESTION: Why are you so quiet
WISE GUY: I am studying to be a mime
TEACHER AND STUDENT
TEACHER – STUDENT
ONE CAT TOO MANY
Teacher: “If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven.”
Teacher: “No, listen carefully… If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven.”
Teacher: “Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Six.”
Teacher: “Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven!”
Teacher: “Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!”
Johnny: “Because I’ve already got a freaking cat!”
DATING JOKE
BUNMI: Whatever happened to that couple that met in the revolving door?
CHI: I think they’re still going around together.
CUTTING COMMENT
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
MARRIED LIFE
APPEARANCE ACT
A man approached a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?”
“Why?” asked the girl.
“Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”