HOLY HUMOUR
Enough for One
A farmer turns up to evensong and discovers that he and the new vicar are the only people there.
“What shall we do?” asks the vicar.
“Well,” replies the farmer, “If I goes to feed my sheep and only one turns up, I feeds her.”
So after four hymns, two sung canticles, one sung psalm, two lessons, prayers for everything under the sun and a twenty-minute sermon the service ends.
“So how did I do?” the vicar asked the farmer.
“Well, if I goes to feed my sheep and only one turns up, I feeds her,” he said, “but I don’t give her the whole bag full!”
Sunday Quote.
“A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.”– Don Marquis
Actual Announcement from Church Bulletin
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
Ask Right.
Two young novice monks had not yet renounced their addiction to cigarettes, so the first one approached the Abbot: “May I smoke while I pray?” The Abbot said no.
So that same novice was startled to see his friend smoking the next day, AND to learn that the Abbot had given permission.
“You have to know how to phrase it,” the friend said, laughing. “You asked if you could smoke while you pray. I asked if I could pray while I smoked.”
Do you have a favourite joke? Please share it with our readers.
Send your jokes to editorial@pridemagazineng.com