Dear Dorothy,
I hope you won’t judge me, but I feel utterly helpless and ashamed about my eating habits. I eat even when I’m not hungry. At work, I stash biscuits in my drawer. At home, I sneak into the kitchen for midnight snacks. I’ve tried diets and apps, but nothing sticks. I eat when I’m stressed, bored or just because food is there.
It’s not that I don’t care about my health. I do. I want to feel better in my body and stop using food as a crutch, but I just don’t know how to control it. Sometimes I feel like food has more power over me than I have over myself.
Is there any hope? Or am I just weak-willed?
Yours,
Ava
Dear Ava,
First things first, this isn’t about being weak-willed. You are human, not broken. Gluttony, in modern terms, often has less to do with greed and more to do with emotional triggers, stress and the way our environment tempts us at every turn.
The truth is, food is more than fuel. It’s comfort, habit, celebration, and at times, escape. When those things become tangled, it can feel like you’re losing the battle before it begins.
The good news? You’re not powerless. Start small. Keep a journal not to count calories, but to track why you eat. Noticed you reached for crisps after a tough meeting? That’s not hunger, that’s a pattern. Recognising it is the first step to rewriting it.
Build structure into your day: regular meals, mindful portions, fewer distractions while eating. Replace guilt with curiosity. If you slip up, don’t berate yourself; ask what led to it.
It might also help to speak to a nutritionist or even a counsellor who can help unpack the emotional weight behind the food. You’re not alone; so many people wrestle with the same issue, but do so in silence.
And remember: you are not defined by your eating habits. You’re allowed to seek help, to start over as many times as needed, and to treat yourself with the same compassion you’d show a friend.
Keep going. You’re already braver than you know.
With kindness,
Dorothy