Dear Dorothy,
I’ve always struggled with networking, and it’s starting to hold me back both professionally and personally. Whenever I attend events or meet new people, I find myself unsure of how to approach others, initiate conversations, or even maintain them. I often leave these situations feeling like I’ve missed opportunities or that I’m not making the most of my connections. It’s frustrating because I know how important networking is, but I just can’t seem to get the hang of it. How can I improve my networking skills and feel more confident in these situations?
Sincerely,
Brandon
Dear Brandon,
First off, let me assure you that you’re not alone in feeling this way. Networking can be intimidating, especially if you’re naturally introverted or if social situations make you anxious. But the good news is that networking is a skill, and like any skill, it can be learned and improved over time.
Start small and be genuine:
Begin by setting small, achievable goals for yourself at each event. Instead of aiming to meet everyone in the room, focus on having meaningful conversations with just a few people. It’s better to have quality connections than a quantity of superficial ones. Be genuinely interested in the people you meet—ask them about their work, their interests, and what brought them to the event. Showing authentic curiosity will make conversations flow more naturally and help you stand out.
Prepare and Practice
Before attending an event, do a little research if possible. Find out who’s likely to be there and identify a few people you’d like to connect with. Think about conversation starters or questions that are relevant to the event or the industry. Practising in low-stakes environments, like social gatherings with friends or colleagues, can also build your confidence over time.
Listen more, talk less
Remember that networking isn’t just about promoting yourself. It’s about building relationships. One of the best ways to do this is by being a good listener. People appreciate when someone is truly engaged in what they’re saying. It not only makes them feel valued but also gives you insights into how you can be of help or collaborate with them in the future.
Follow up
The key to effective networking isn’t just making connections—it’s maintaining them. After meeting someone, make sure to follow up with a message or email, mentioning something specific from your conversation. This reinforces the connection and shows that you value the relationship.
Be yourself
Finally, don’t feel pressured to be someone you’re not. Authenticity is the cornerstone of good networking. People are drawn to those who are genuine, so embrace your unique qualities and approach networking in a way that feels right for you.
With time and practice, you’ll find your own rhythm and style. Remember, networking is about building mutually beneficial relationships, and you have valuable contributions to offer. Keep at it, and soon enough, you’ll see your efforts pay off.
Warmly,
Dorothy