Break ups sucks. Imagine, this was someone you once cherished and envisioned spending the rest of your life with. But life happens and it becomes obvious the relationship is heading nowhere, instead of wasting your time and draining yourself emotionally, you should break up with your partner. You entered the relationship as adults so you should leave same. Some couples break up in the wrong manner. As much as it is hurtful, there are standard ways to break up. These include:
1. Answer why you must break up with your partner
Before having the conversation, answer the ‘why’. Ask yourself why you want to end it: Is there a lack of romantic feelings, do you have limited common ground, are you just not feeling it. Remember feelings are unstable. If the reasons are valid and strong, you may want to go ahead. Think long and deep about your reasons so that when you have the conversation you are speaking convincingly.
2. Do it sharp
Don’t drag, request that you both meet in person. Instead of beating about the bush, drop the time bomb and give no room for over flogging issues. Once you have made up your mind to break up with your partner, don’t start rehearsing lines, just say what needs to be said.
3. Be kind
Say what needs to be said kindly. If you are the one initiating the break up, the other person may overreact. Don’t trigger the wrong emotions and feelings, allow the other person to be. Be kind and empathetic. Remember, this is another human being with feelings, not just some entity on the other end of your cell phone.
4. Don’t focus on what they did wrong
The break up conversation would be uncomfortable. Come prepared. Don’t try to play victim or the blame game. Just be direct using sentences that reflect your understanding of how the person feels, while also making sure you clearly express yourself.
5. Don’t make false promises
After initiating a break up, don’t give the other person false hopes. A clean breakup conversation doesn’t always mean the absence of guilt and lingering feelings towards the other person. In order to end the break up on a positive note, you may want to placate the other person. There is no need to do this. Whatever your decision, stand firm and give the other person space to accept the new reality.