My dear,
If you dated a man for eight years, and he didn’t marry you, something must be amiss and his love for you is questionable. Are you sure you were his only lover?
Choosing to lust after him instead of concentrating on your marriage will not end well for you. I honestly think you made the right decision to move on with your life. When we were younger we used to describe such men as NFA: No Future Ambition. You should not regret your decision to move on.
Once upon a time, a dog was crossing a river with a bone in its mouth. Suddenly, it noticed another dog inside the river but it did not realise that it was its reflection so it barked at the other dog. The bone fell in the water and the reflection disappeared. Then the dog realised that there was no other dog.
My dear, don’t chase after what may seem like shadows. Your ex is in the past. You have your future ahead with your husband. Focus on building a loving relationship with him and stop living in a fantasy world of lost love.
Have you considered that your ex may not be giving you any thought and has moved on with his life? You should not regret your decision. Pay attention to your husband whom you have described as loving. Men are quite perceptive. If he senses that your heart is with someone else, it could be the end of your marriage.
Concentrate on making your marriage a success. It may be difficult initially, but try to forget about the past, with time you will get to love him. Many arranged marriages turn out to be happy ones. You have a new love in your life. Remember, A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush!
The success of your marriage is in your hands.
Good luck