My Dear,
From your letter, I can read that you are a bright and intelligent young woman. Unfortunately, you are married to a man who does not value you as an individual with rights and privileges that must be respected. He also takes you for granted.
You have not mentioned in your letter that you have told him to his face that you object to how he treats you. You seem to be afraid of him, is this because you are not self-confident?
I don’t think it is best to suffer in silence; it does not bode well for your physical, mental and emotional wellbeing. You have to place value on yourself.
“You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.” – Desiderata
You have to take proactive steps by finding a job, which gets you home on time or starting a small business that you can run from home. Also, make sure you have a few friends and confidants because it isn’t wise to suffer in silence. Your church parishioners and church groups may be a good place to start to meet and connect with people outside the home.
Most men who disregard their spouses have very low self-esteem. They see the need in making their women believe they cannot cope without them. But once you quietly take the right steps to gain your self-confidence, confront your husband and tell him you will not tolerate his disrespectful attitude anymore.
After this, if there is no noticeable change in his character, I’ll advise you to walk away and create a new life for you and your children. At 30, you still have your whole life ahead of you. Goodluck.