Laugh Quote
You can’t get out of life alive.
Wise Guys Answer To Stupid Question
Question: How can a man go eight days without sleeping?
Wise Guy: No problem, he sleeps at night.
Corny Chat Up Line
You know I’d like to invite you over, but I’m afraid you’re so hot that you’ll skyrocket my air-conditioning bill.
Business Joke
Busy day
My boss phoned me today.
He said, “Is everything okay at the office?”
I said, “Yes, it’s all under control. It’s been a very busy day, I haven’t stopped.”
“Can you do me a favour?” he asked.
I said, “Of course, what is it?”
He said, “Hurry up and take your shot, I’m behind you on the 7th hole.”
Cutting Comment
“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.” – George Carlin
Married Life
You’ve got to die
A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the fourth time. “How wonderful! But I hope you don’t mind me asking what happened to your first husband?” “He ate poisonous mushrooms and died.” “Oh, how tragic! What about your second husband?” “He ate poisonous mushrooms too and died.” “Oh, how terrible! I’m almost afraid to ask you about your third husband.” “He died of a broken neck.” “A broken neck?” “He wouldn’t eat the mushrooms.”
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