I wear regular house clothes when leaving, but in my bags are the clothes I’d wear to the party–oh, and of course, some books.
I get to Rich’s place seven-thirty. His parents are already asleep. His dad’s job always requires him to wake up ridiculously early and stay till evening, so he had to sleep early. His mom doesn’t have a clear reason as to why she sleeps this early, except that her husband is sleeping early. She doesn’t wake up early, though.
“You’re late,” Rich complains, wearing boxer shorts.
“You’re not dressed yet.”
We don’t say anything afterwards, we only get dressed. I wear a black polo with brown trousers and a black air-max. Rich wears a white short sleeved shirt with three buttons loose and white trousers with a cream colored shoe. I’m obscured, he’s conspicuous. Our clothes kind of describe our personalities.
His brother isn’t around, not that I was expecting to see him. His parents kicked him out for the zillionth time last month. I ask Rich how we’re supposed to get to the party, he answers with a smirk.
The time is eight-fourteen when we leave. We walk for nearly forty minutes before getting to our destination. I curse and then I wonder why Rich wore that shoe if he knew all along he was going to have to walk. It was night though, so no one would see the stained white shoe.
Rich’s brother, Nelson, is at the gate, waiting. He complains that we came late before taking us inside. The party is nothing like I thought it would be. Although I’m not sure what I was expecting. I’ve only ever been to birthday parties and school fundraising parties–one of which is coming up sometime next month. The principal doesn’t waste an opportunity to take money from our parents.
This party is much more fun. There are drinks, an actual DJ with loud and fun music, and girls dressed in exotic and revealing clothes, dancing with reckless abandon with boys and girls alike. I spot a couple making out in a corner. It makes me think of Becca.
Rich and Nelson begin having fun immediately. Nelson orders beers. I get one. After my first sip I immediately hate it, but I don’t show it. It’s different from the last alcohol I took.
The brothers talk and drink and I’m left out, but not because I wasn’t included. It’s a conversation I can join, but I don’t know what to say. A few minutes later Nelson leaves in pursuit of a girl he saw on the dance floor.
Rich tries to start a conversation with me about girls, but it is ended by one. He turns his attention to her and I’m left to myself again. That girl looks like she’s twice his age, I think to myself.
I zone out of the party, realizing then that I don’t know how to have fun. Rich takes the girl to dance and I force myself to take another sip of beer, and then another. I don’t get used to the taste.
I notice a girl sitting at the other end of the bar table. She looks to be around my age. She looks pretty, but I’m not sure, not with the shiny lights and the beer. I’m drawn to her, somehow, someway I can’t explain. She sits alone, not drinking, not dancing and not talking. My heart beats faster. I ignore it, and her.
After what seems like forever, Rich returns. He’d been drinking since he was gone. “That bitch pushed me when I tried to kiss her. Why the hell would she do that?”
Probably because you’re a kid. For some reason I look at the girl sitting alone. I linger. Rich notices. “Go talk to her,” he says. “She’s not that pretty though.” She’s beautiful, I decide. “Buuttt… you need a lit-tle adventure… in your life, my boy,” he slurs.
“She’s older,” I say.
“Look at her. She’s our age.” I shake my head. “Come on, go!”
Rich pushes me. I don’t expect it, so I stagger out of my seat, barely catching myself. I want to go back to my seat, but I’m standing now. What could the harm be?
My heart resumes pounding. I decide to go back, but then she looks up… at me. I didn’t realize I had gotten so close. I walk closer until I’m beside her.
“Hi,” I manage despite the seismic activity in my chest.
She smiles. She’s definitely beautiful… in an unconventional way. “Hi.”
“My name’s Dan.”
Her voice is alto and sweet, “Nice to meet you, Dan.” I notice there’s a half full cup of not-beer in front of her. “What can I do for you?”
“It’s just,” I begin, and then I take a deep breath. Too deep. “You looked lonely. And personally I think it’s a crime for someone so beautiful to be alone.”
She studies me. Her face is plane, and for some reason that unsettles me. “How old are you?”
I’m unsettled, but I don’t show it. “I’m in here, what do you think?”
She says, “That you should take your losses. I may not look it but I’m older than you, and I don’t particularly feel like engaging in child abuse.”
That does it. I return to my seat. It’s taken, and Rich is gone. For a while I fear they left me, but then I spot him. Thank God he wore white. I wander about the party, not dancing, keeping my eye on Rich.
I finish my beer which I didn’t realize I was still holding. We go home around two, and every hour I spent at the party was a waste. Except the one minute I spent with the girl.
I won’t see her again, but for some I reason I can’t get her out of my head throughout the weekend. I keep thinking about the sound of her voice, the shape of her face, the cut of her lip and the sadness in her eyes. I wished I take the sadness away.
I knock the thought of her out of my head. I won’t see her again, why linger?