HOLY HUMOUR
ENOUGH
Every ten years, the monks in the monastery are allowed to break their vow of silence to speak two words. Ten years go by and it’s one monk’s first chance. He thinks for a second before saying, “Food bad.”
Ten years later, he says, “Bed hard.”
It’s the big day, a decade later. He gives the head monk a long stare and says – “I quit.”
“I’m not surprised,” the head monk says. “You’ve been complaining ever since you got here.”
THINK ABOUT IT
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. – Steve Martin
IF
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea, does that mean that one enjoys it?
CORNY CHAT UP LINE
Hi, are you here to meet a nice man or will I do?
DID YOU HEAR
I used to be a banker but I lost interest
THE SUNDAY JOKE
CAN’T SUE
Noticing a mistake in St. Peter’s roster, God calls Satan; “It seems you accidentally received some of my professionals down there: a teacher, a doctor and a farmer.”
“Yeah,” Satan replies. “All the more for me!”
God replies, “You better send them up here immediately.”
Satan says, “No way. I’m keeping them.”
God says, “Send them up here, or I’ll sue the horns right off you.”
Satan laughs uproariously, “Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?”
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