It’s a Laugh Sunday
HOLY HUMOUR
The priest was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play. ”Here’s a copy of the service,” he said impatiently. “But you’ll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances.”
During the service, the priest paused and said, “My Brothers and Sisters in Christ, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need one million naira more. Any of you who can pledge ten thousand naira or more, please stand up. “
At that moment, the substitute organist played “Arise O Compatriot……….” (the Nigerian National Anthem).
And that is how the substitute became the regular organist!
DIET LOGIC
Said the fat lady to her friend as she craved a bit of her chocolate –
“Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree. That makes it a plant. Therefore, chocolate is salad.”
UPBRINGING
You spend the first 2 years of a child’s life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
HERE’S A GOOD ONE.
“The problem with quotes from the Internet, is that you can never truly verify their authenticity.” -Abraham Lincoln
YOUR TURN
One young lady to another: Old people at weddings always poke me and say “you’re next”. So I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.