HOLY HUMOUR
FINDING JESUS
A young girl is walking along the riverbank and comes across a religious gathering where the pastor is a baptizing member of his flock. The pastor asks the girl if she has found Jesus. “No,” she says. Whereupon the pastor pushes her under water, pulls her back up, and repeats, “Have you found Jesus?”
“No,” she says. She is dunked back into the water and again asked, “Have you found Jesus?”
“No,” she says, exasperated, “are you sure this is where he fell in?”
THINK ABOUT IT
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Mae West
IF
If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.
CORNY CHAT UP LINE
I seem to have lost my way. Would you mind taking me with you?
DID YOU HEAR
Question: Did you hear the one about the geologist?
Answer: He took his wife for granite so she left him
THE SUNDAY JOKE
REINCARNATION
The poor thing was a perfect specimen of unblessed womanhood. She had a pug nose, buck teeth, a wrinkled face, and a sagging chin. Besides she was way overweight with a head of hair that looked for the entire world like a worn out mop. After looking her over for some moments, the beauty parlor attendant muttered, “I can see one hope.” “What’s that?” eagerly asked the woman. The attendant solemnly declared, “Reincarnation.”
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