I had a different thought to be written today, one that would have been another female-cheer article. However, something more thoughtful interrupted that line of thought and I’m grateful that it did.
Nearly two years ago, my beautiful father passed on. Losing a loved one is never easy, but I’m not here to pry open emotional wounds. A few days ago, I opened his wardrobe for the first time after his passing; I wanted a shirt and I found one. Although, I noticed the sleeves had been clumsily mended by an obvious sewing amateur – my dad. The shirt was worn out and there were similar ones regally hanging in his wardrobe. Then it hit me; all my years alive, I never saw him buy anything for himself – not a shirt or pants or even shoes.
Not one thing.
Every material thing he owned was given by my mom or my siblings and I. Instead, he spent his money ensuring there was always food, my mom looked good, we all had the best education (and looked good while at it), et cetera.
He never put himself first.
This isn’t peculiar to my dad or his generation. A 34-year-old friend of mine who has a family of his own recently travelled out of the country for work. While returning, he bought extra luggage that only contained gifts for his wife and son – excluding himself from the purchase. I couldn’t relate. Going shopping and excluding myself didn’t make much sense from my female perspective. Yet so many men make similar sacrifices and more, unfortunately, these are undocumented and go unnoticed.
So, why aren’t men celebrated enough?
Perhaps, it’s as a result of the men who engage in multiple societal ills or perpetuate wrongdoings against the rights of women that taints the good work done by others. Or is it because we believe it’s their responsibility, hence, we withhold well-deserved praise?
I believe our current world reality is veering towards a dangerous ideology that holistically touts men as villains rather than subjectively dealing with the men who act/are depraved. I also believe men should be celebrated more, not less.
What do you think?