After what seemed like an eternity, he rolled off me. By this time, I was bleeding. Still, in shock, I dragged myself out of the room, went straight to my room, flung myself on the bed and wept bitterly for a very long time.
Later as I cleaned myself up, I made up my mind to end my life. He came banging on the door, pleading for forgiveness, but I didn’t budge. After a while, I heard him leave the house and drive off.
I grabbed a paper and a pen and scribbled a note for my mum, telling her what happened, and leaving afterwards.
“Angie darling, are you awake?”
My Mother’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts. There was a worried look on her face.
“How are you feeling?” She asked, holding my hand.
The tears came back again and I asked why she saved my life. “You should have allowed me to die.” I snatched my hand away from her grip angrily.
“You don’t have to die because of what happened. I know it’s an abomination, but it was a mistake” her eyes pleading with me.
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing “What do you mean by ‘it was a mistake’? He did it with his eyes wide open”, I screamed as loud as the medication let me.
“No, you don’t understand, Angie. After reciting those incantations, he was no longer himself; he didn’t even know who you were until the dreadful act was over.” Mum said with tears in her eye.
She held my hand again, “He left this letter for you. I picked it up and read it. I think you should read it too”, she said softly. Mom looked drained and in pain. I couldn’t help but feel sorry for her; it can’t be easy as a mother and a wife to deal with this.
I read the letter not knowing what to expect.
My dear child,
How do I make you understand? I am really ashamed of myself and I can’t face you! You know, I have been nursing the ambition of becoming the president and I was ready to do anything to fulfil my dream. So when the opportunity came, I grabbed it.
I went to a native doctor who gave me some connotation. To cut a long story short, I was instructed to make love to the first lady I set my eyes on after the last day of the incantation. That morning, I just finished my last incantation. When I got up, I saw a lady at my door. I picked her up and made love to her as I was instructed.
It was when you left my room crying that I realized what had happened. It dawned on me that I had rapped my own daughter. The daughter I love so much. I have wept endlessly since then. I hate myself and my ambitions. It means nothing to me now. I am giving it up.
I sent your mummy away because I never wanted her to be my victim. Why then must it be you!!! I am going away for some time to get over the evil I committed. You need time too. I will be back in a month or two. Forgive me, please.
Daddy
After reading it, I felt calmer. I no longer felt like dying, but I couldn’t stop the tears that came rushing down. I asked my mum where he was. And she said she didn’t know.
It’s been 10 years since I last saw my dad. My mom has given up all hope that he’ll ever return. We only pray that wherever he is, he’s safe and alive and that he knows I’ve forgiven him and let go of the past.
Story by Nkiru Okoronkwo
1 Comment
What do i think… Hmmm…. Its waw….. Hmmmmm
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Chai…. I loved it