Meeting your partner’s friends can affect your relationship. It may be an indicator of where your relationship is headed. If your partner is excited for you to meet the people closest to them, there’s a good chance that they’re really into you. Normally your partner’s friends should welcome you into the group with open arms. But supposing the reverse is the case. What do you do? How do you handle it? The following tips would help:
1. Pause
If your partner’s friends are making you feel uncomfortable, it’s not a bad idea to take a step back and remove yourself from the situation. Taking a moment to breathe and relax will help you avoid acting out in ways that can make things worse. When you have a moment to yourself, you can also try to figure out where their negative feelings toward you come from. Is it something you’re doing? Are you coming off the wrong way? Or are they judging you too harshly? Since it’s early on in your relationship, things can always change. In the meantime, avoid drama.
2. Look at things from their perspective
When entering into a relationship, it’s important to remember you’re not the only one impacted. Relationships with your family and friends also change. You and your partner may be ready to start a new chapter in your lives, but their friends may not be. If that’s the case, your partner’s friends may not be as warm and welcoming as they can be. This can happen if your partner is choosing to spend more time with you than with them. With time, things should balance out. But in the early stages, it’s perfectly fine to encourage your partner to spend time with their friends while you spend time with yours.
3. Show genuine interest in them
People don’t know how much you know until they know how much you care. Do your best to get to know your partner’s friends and be authentic in the way you go about it. The biggest thing to remember here is you don’t have to go out of your way to do something that will make them like you. Note that people are going to like or dislike you regardless of what you do. Keep it simple, no need to fake it.
4. Don’t be a “Personal Manager”
People get triggered for all kinds of different reasons. You likely won’t know what someone’s triggers are until you get to know them. If you triggered your partner’s friend in some way, the important thing to do here is to not take it too personally. While you can’t control how other people feel about you, understand that triggers are a sign that something may very well be coming up in this situation to be healed.
5. Find common interests
You can tell a lot about a person by the company they keep. If you get along great with your partner and they get along great with their friends, there must be something you and their friends can connect on. You may like the same band, a certain sports team, or you may just like drinking at the same bar. You don’t have to be best friends with them. But if you can find just one thing you have in common, it would help a great deal.
6. Discuss the situation with your partner
One of the keys to a successful relationship is good communication. So if you’re having issues with your partner’s friends, let your partner know. Try to minimize the drama as much as possible by using “I” statements to express yourself. If your new partner values their friends’ opinions, especially if they talk badly about you, they may actually believe them. When this happens, you may be in a situation where your partner does not support you or stand up for you.