Dear Dorothy,
My sister was divorced two years ago, and she isn’t coping. Things worsened last month when her son accepted a job within her ex-husband’s company. She’s been through a rough patch and even threatened suicide.
She has worked hard to look after her son for the past two years but has had to resort to tranquillisers. Our mum helps as much as she can, but I wonder is there anything more I can do other than provide a shoulder to cry on?
F. L.
Dear F.L,
Please don’t underestimate the importance of just being there. Having a willing listener who doesn’t judge, criticise, or try to dictate, will help your sister unload a lot of the emotional baggage she’s still carrying. If she hasn’t already spoken to her doctor about getting support, perhaps that’s something you could gently suggest.
She clearly hasn’t come to terms with her divorce and is finding it hard to accept the fact that her son is trying to maintain contact with his father. You could help her further by suggesting that it’s better for her son’s long-term emotional make-up to be on good terms with both parents. If you find it hard to cope with this, try getting your sister some professional counselling help.
Yours Truly,
Dorothy